Month: February 2020

There’s no such thing as being TOO safe — outdoor security cameras are a must-have

Posted on by Mike
blink outdoor security camera system

The Blink XT Outdoor Home Security Camera System can show you if the noise you heard outside is an intruder or just a raccoon looking for a snack.

WEATHERPROOF FOR OUTDOOR OR INDOOR USE: Place and move your wireless Blink camera anywhere around your home both inside and out. Start off with a small system and expand to up to 10 cameras on one Blink Sync Module

MOTION DETECTOR: Built-in motion sensor alarm, when motion detector is triggered, Wi-Fi cameras will send an alert to your smartphone and record a short clip of the event to the cloud

BATTERY POWERED SECURITY SYSTEM: Wireless home camera with 2-year battery life, powered by 2 Lithium AA 1.5v non-rechargeable Lithium batteries (included), data is sent from IP cameras over Wi-Fi

SMART HOME VIDEO SECURITY WITH HD VIDEO: Simple self-install home monitoring in minutes; easy to control wireless cameras with the free Blink Home Monitor iOS or Android app (Requires iOS 10.3 or Android 5 Lollipop or higher)

FREE CLOUD STORAGE: Totally wire-free, with no monthly fees or service contract required

blink outdoor security camera system
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The two things that should start every American’s day

Posted on by Mike
funny christian t-shirt all i need is a little coffee and a lot of jesus

Show everyone that you love coffee and Jesus by rocking this funny coffee lover Christian T-shirt.

funny christian t-shirt all i need is a little coffee and a lot of jesus
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Wear your patriotism proudly

Posted on by Mike
bald eagle american flag winter t-shirt

This is a beautiful t-shirt. Nuff said.

100% Cotton

Made in the USA

Hand-dyed and screen printed by expert artisans in New Hampshire

bald eagle american flag winter t-shirt
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50,000 volts of non-lethal protection – don’t be a victim!

Posted on by Mike
non-lethal protection taser

Fire this 50,000 volt taser from up to 15 feet away! Then you’ve got a good 30 seconds to get the hell out of there.

Taser Pulse with Laser LED

2 Live Cartridges

1 Soft Holster

Lithium Power Magazine (Battery Pack)

Target

non-lethal protection taser
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It’s all in the way you tell it!

Posted on by Jim
Mansion

The Last Will and Testament of Jonathan Smith

Jonathon Smith is on his deathbed and knows the end is near. His nurse, his wife, his daughter, and two sons are with him. He asks for two witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to record his last wishes, and when all is ready, he begins to speak:

“My son, Bernie, I want you to take the Mayfair houses. My daughter Sybil, you take the apartments over the east end. My son, Jamie, I want you to take the offices over the City Center. Sarah, my dear wife, please take all of the residential buildings on the banks of the river.”

The nurse and witnesses are blown away as they did not realize his extensive holdings, and as Jonathan slops away, the nurse says, “Mrs. Smith, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property.”

The wife replies, “Property? This jerk had various paper routes – that’s what he had.”

Mansion
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The world’s greatest gun cleaning mat

Posted on by Mike
patriotic gun cleaning mat 2nd amendment

LARGE PROTECTIVE SURFACE: 11″x17″ Pistol cleaning mat helps protect your kitchen table, work bench, shooting table or desk. Perfect accessory for gun cleaning or mouse pad.

PREMIUM MATERIALS: Stitched border, black polyester top with waterproofing coating, white heat transfer printing prevents smearing, and non-slip natural tree rubber backing. Perfect for gunsmith or hobbyist

EXCLUSIVE: Distressed US flag with Text of 2nd Amendment – Exclusive URB design!

patriotic gun cleaning mat 2nd amendment
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Free Home Security! Provided by the government!

Posted on by Mike
free home security joke

I took down my Rebel flag (which you can’t buy on EBAY any more) and peeled the NRA sticker off my front window. I disconnected my home alarm system and quit the candy-ass Neighborhood Watch. I bought two Pakistani flags and put one at each corner of the front yard. Then I purchased the black flag of ISIS (which you CAN Buy on EBAY) and ran it up the flag pole.

Now the local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching my house 24/7. I’ve NEVER felt safer and I’m saving $69.95 a month that ADT used to charge me.

Plus, I bought burkas for me to wear when I shop or travel. Everyone moves out of the way, and security can’t pat me down. If they say I’m a male wearing a burka, I just say I’m feeling like a woman today!

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It’s time to secure your home! And it’s cheaper than you think

Posted on by Mike
ring home security system

The Ring Alarm Home Security System is a great first step to making sure your home is safe.

Ring Alarm puts whole-home security at your fingertips. Get alerts on your smart phone when doors or windows open or motion is detected.

Optional 24/7 professional monitoring is just $10/month. No contracts or cancellation fees.

Manage Ring Alarm and other Ring products—including Ring Doorbell—with the Ring app.

Customize Ring Alarm for your needs. Add components at any time for whole home protection.

Easily setup Ring Alarm in minutes—without tools or professional installation.

The 5 piece kit includes a base station, contact sensor, motion detector, keypad, and range extender.

Works with Alexa to arm, disarm, and check the status of your Ring Alarm security system with your voice.

ring home security system
secure your home from intruders ring home security system
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Victoria’s Secret???

Posted on by Jim

A husband walks into ‘Victoria’s Secret’ to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife.

He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price – the more sheer, the higher the price.

Naturally, he opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500, and takes it home.

He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.

Upstairs the wife thinks (she’s no dummy), “I have an idea. It’s so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won’t put it on but I’ll do the modelling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.”

She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.

The husband says, “Good grief, you’d think for $500, they’d at least iron it!”

He never heard the shot.

Funeral on Thursday at Noon.

Donations in lieu of Flowers to the National Association for Retarded Husbands (NARH)

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Good luck finding a cooler light than this

Posted on by Mike
starbright waterproof led cooler light coleman igloo

Apologies for the horrible pun! Seriously, you’re gonna need this cooler light at night.

NO MOUNTING REQUIRED: Turn it on and toss it in! DOES NOT have to be permanently attach to the inside of your cooler like other cooler lights!

WATERPROOF IN UP TO 6 FEET OF WATER: The Starbright Cooler light is waterproof up to 6 feet and can last up to 48 hours submerged in your cooler on the energy saving setting.

WHITE LIGHT AND RED LIGHT: Our cooler light will also has two color options: White light and red light.

RECHARGEABLE, NO BATTERIES REQUIRED: One charge can provide up to 60 hours of white light and up to 31 hours of red light.

LOW MAINTENANCE: The light can be fully recharged in approximately 5 hours. It can be charged from most USB power sources.

starbright waterproof led cooler light coleman igloo
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