The MAGIC Green Hat…

US border patrol hat

Visiting in South Western USA, I needed to go to the emergency room. Not wanting to sit there for 4 hours, I put on my MAGIC GREEN HAT.

When I went into the E.R., I noticed that 3/4 of the people got up and left. I guess they decided that they weren’t that sick after all. It cut at least 3 hours off my waiting time.

Here’s the hat:

It also works at Dept. of Motor Vehicles. It saved me 5 hours.

At the Laundromat, three minutes after entering, I had my choice of any machine, most still running.

It might also cut your wait time at the grocery store.

But…don’t try it at McDonald’s…
The whole crew ran out the back door and I never did get my order!

Know what real STRESS is???

hitchhiker stress

You pick up a hitchhiker…A beautiful girl. Suddenly, she faints inside your truck and you take her to the hospital. Now that’s stressful.

But at the hospital, they say she is pregnant and congratulates you that you’re going to be the father. You say that you are not the father, but the girl says you are. This is getting very stressful!

You request a DNA test to prove that you are not the father.

After the tests are completed, the doctor says the test shows you’re infertile, and probably have been since birth. You’re extremely stressed but relieved.

On your way back home, you think about your FIVE kids at home.

NOW THAT’S STRESS!!!